Delayed Reaction

I am feeling a little better today.  I have to thank all you blogger friends for your support yesterday – it was a tough day and your words meant the world – you dear dear bloggers were my after care.

I think I realized one of the reasons I was hit so hard yesterday.  Sir is great post scene, he really is.  There is lots of snuggles and kisses and stroking and warmth.  It doesn’t last as long as I’d love but, you know, life.  But last time I hit a weird place after I got home – maybe you can let me know if anything similar has ever happened to you.

I got home and about 20 minutes later I was totally spaced out.  I don’t mean the nefarious “cunt brain” kind of spaced out but a border line subspace spaced out.  I was fuzzy and foggy, my pupils were dilated, I could barely string together a sentence without stuttering.  It was weird and something I have never experienced before.  It wasn’t as all encompassing that I have heard subspace is, but I was definitely out of it.  It lasted for a couple of hours, and a coffee and a shower brought me back.  What the heck?  Maybe my mood yesterday was that the aftercare happened before I needed it?  I dunno.

But my thoughts still stand that I need to just have an open conversation with Sir about all my thoughts and feelings before any more play time.  I hated feeling like I didn’t know if I could go to him with my bad feelings yesterday and I need to know where we stand on stuff like that.  And it obviously isn’t his fault if I don’t receive something I need because I haven’t told him I need it.

I messaged Sir today asking him if we could talk, that I had a lot of thoughts and questions that I would like to share if he was interested.  He says he would love to hear all my thoughts and so a good talk is now officially on the agenda.  I feel better knowing that regardless of the outcome, I will have been open and honest.


13 thoughts on “Delayed Reaction

    1. I was still totally aware of my surroundings etc so I don’t think it was “true” subspace, but it was definitely bizarre. I almost wish I would have been able to continue playing at that point just to see what would have happened lol.

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  1. It’s like a semi enjoyable ptsd. It happens…. When Sir is in town, the entire time is a scene (even when it’s not) I don’t drop until he leaves and it really sucks. During the day at work I’ll get that same spaced out feeling, but only when I know he’s waiting for me to get home. Everyone drop different. Just remember to breathe and it will be fine. Your doing the best you can by writing it out and talking with your Sir.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You know not knowing what to do is an emotional minefield. I get what you’re saying and it has up’s n down’s. So long as you can talk about it, that’s the most important thing, be open about your needs. It’s not easy sometimes. All the best to you.

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  3. I have similar when daddy leaves, when he’s finished we lay an hold each other an kiss till it’s time, but for at least an hour after I have to focus on my breathing to stop this feeling, I sit in the corner legs crossed facing the wall close my eyes an breath, in through nose out through mouth, big deep an slow, it really helps focus an relax, I hope this may help you, xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It probably is a type of meditation, just be careful an try not to over think certain things that can an does cause orgasms where you sit lol an will make this feeling your trying to come down from last longer. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

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