I feel like a fire has been lit inside me. After experiencing a type of sensual domination I have never felt before I want….more.
I want the whispers in my ear, I want the light caresses all over my skin, I want to feel my breath hitch as I wait and wonder what it going to happen next. I want the flogger, the whip, I want the cane. I want it to burn and hurt, I want to squirm and cry out, I want to feel hands soothing me afterwards and the whisper of “good girl” in my ear. I want marks that last for days, reminding me of my submission at the hands of that remarkable man.
I love how he poses me in the positions he likes. The position he prefers to deliver his impact, the way he poses me standing so he can walk circles around me, touching, stripping me bare. The way he grabs my chin to pose my head for a kiss. How he instructs me to lay my head on the floor with my ass up, how he touches me there, looking, leaving nothing to hide, how he leans over my back to tell me how he can see everything. I love how he posed my body very carefully to maximize his pleasure as he slid into my ass. And I love how this otherwise fairly quiet man, a man who dominates in whispers, cried out as he came in my ass.
I love how shameless I felt as I screamed out my need to cum “please Sir I need to cum!” and his benevolent permission to do so.
And I want….more.
Sir isn’t free for the rest of this weekend, which is a total bummer but I of course totally understand, he does have a life outside of D/s after all LOL. But I can’t help the feeling that I have of needing another session to feel more….solid. Like this is more than I one time thing. I have no reason to feel it was only a one time thing, Sir has said how much he is looking forward to getting together again. I will not be one of those women who become needy or clingy. But I also recognize that there is a bit of inevitable clinginess, for lack of a better word, within a D/s dynamic. As the submissive, I put a lot on the line emotionally to submit. I am not someone who can play really casually (unless it was with my Dom there participating). I need to feel like I am important, wanted. And I hate that in a way. It would be so much easier if I could just go and get my rocks off and call it a day. A BDSM booty call so to speak lol. But at the very least I need to feel like the man I give my submission to is also a man I can cuddle with a watch a movie, or make a meal together. Friends, but more. Friendship but with a level of intimacy.
But I will reign myself in lol and just enjoy the memories (even if they do make me uncomfortably horny ahhhh!) of our night and look forward with a submissive heart for our next encounter.